Speechwriters should mostly use active voice rather than passive voice

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

On June 22, 2024 I blogged about how I write speeches in active voice – not passive voice. An article by The University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill from The Writing Center – College of Arts and Sciences titled Passive Voice [Tips & Tools] explains:

 

“A passive construction occurs when you make the object of an action into the subject of a sentence. That is, whoever or whatever is performing the action is not the grammatical subject of the sentence. Take a look at the passive reframing of a familiar joke [Why did the chicken cross the road?]:

 

‘Why was the road crossed by the chicken?’ “

 

On December 19, 2017 I blogged about More speechwriting resources from the Congressional Research Service. In that post I discussed a publication by Thomas H. Neale and Dana Ely from April 12, 2007, their CRS Report 98-170, titled Speechwriting in Perspective: A Brief Guide to Effective and Persuasive Communication.

 

Under Contemporary Style and Tone the fourth paragraph explains:

 

“Writers should generally use simple declarative sentence, preferably in the active voice, when making important statements of fact, assertion, or opinion. Use of the passive voice should not be dismissed out of hand, however; it is sometimes the more desirable form, and can lend grace and variety to the speaker’s flow of words that stimulates the listener. It is excessive use that should be avoided. Similarly, exclusive use of the active voice can impart a choppy, juvenile cadence to even a content-rich speech.”

 

A detailed article by Jacob M. Carpenter from 2022 in Legal Communication & Rhetoric titled The Problems and Positives of Passives: Exploring Why Controlling Passive Voice and Nominalizations Is About More Than Preference and Style states that you should use passive voice:

 

To emphasize something other than the actor

When the actor is unimportant or unknown

To improve cohesion and concision through dovetailing

To portray objectivity or deflect responsibility

To distance the reader psychologically

 

He also notes that:

 

“Passive voice at the beginning of a sentence may create an effective ‘dovetail’ connecting adjacent sentences….

 

In subsequent telephone conferences the defendant’s counsel promised to produces the documents within 30 days. The documents were never produced.”

 

My graphic uses a modified version of the man posting a sign from the Library of Congress.

 

 

Native English speakers need to adapt when speaking to non-native audiences or to children

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There is an article by Sonja Bonin on pages 26 to 28 of the June 2021 issue of Toastmaster magazine titled Speak the Language, Speak the Culture. The second paragraph of her section on Talking to a Non-Native Audience says:

 

“ ‘Most native English speakers think they are communicating, where in fact, they aren’t,’ says John Zimmer, a professional speaker and speaking coach from Canada who has worked for the United Nations and has been living in the French -speaking part of Switzerland for more than 20 years. His experience has taught him to speak ‘a different English’ when he’s talking to non-native speakers. ‘Back in Canada, I speak faster, and I use more slang and colloquialisms; I also allow for fewer pauses.’ Here are some of his tips for English speakers talking to a non-native audience:  

 

Talk slowly, enunciate well, and use more pauses.

 

Avoid jargon, filler words (such as ‘like’ or ‘actually’), an colloquialisms (‘We’d’ve come’ is far more difficult to process than ‘We would have come’; don’t say ‘we need to up our game’ – instead, say ‘we need to improve.’).

 

Beware of phrasal verbs, where the meaning is different than the combined meanings of the individual words, such as ‘I’ll see to it’ or ‘he turned me down.’

 

Use the active voice over the passive voice and the affirmative over the negative (say ‘often’ instead of ‘not uncommon’).

 

Use short words and short sentences and avoid unnecessary flourishes. Zimmer’s recommendation is ‘Value clarity over creativity.’ “

 

John Zimmer presents similar advice in a detailed 24-minute YouTube video from the European Speechwriter Network on May 15, 2024 titled Why native English speakers can’t speak English! At twelve minutes he says:

 

“…don’t initiate when you can begin. Don’t terminate when you can end. Don’t transmit if you can send, and please, please don’t utilize when you can just use.”

    

The same advice as for non-native speakers also applies to children.

 

The cartoon audience was adapted from an image at Openclipart.

 

I write speeches in active voice - not passive voice

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

An article by the Writing Center for California State University San Marcos (CSUSM) titled Voice and Point of View advises:

 

“Passive voice occurs when the verb’s agent (the doer) is not the subject of the sentence. Active voice occurs when the subject of a sentence performs the verb’s action. Active voice is favored in most academic disciplines and everyday speech due to it is considered more assertive and less wordy. However, passive voice is favored in scientific disciplines since the observer may not be aware of what causes a phenomenon.”

 

A second article by The Writing Center for the University of Wisconsin – Madison titled Use the active voice discusses when to use passive voice:

 

“Generally, try to use the active voice whenever possible. Passive voice sentences often use more words, can be vague, and can lead to a tangle of prepositional phrases.”

 

When to use passive voice:

To emphasize the action rather than the actor

To keep the subject and focus consistent throughout a passage

To be tactful by not naming the actor

To describe a condition where the actor is unknown or unimportant

To create an authoritative tone”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A third article by John Cadley on page 28 in the April 2022 Toastmaster magazine titled Weasel Words gives a specific example:

 

“And let’s not forget the passive voice, a plethora of opportunities for the weaselly minded. For instance, ‘The design was presented to the client.’ Who was the presenter? Nobody, which is exactly what you want if the client hates the work. Compare this to ‘I presented the design to the client.’ That’s the active voice. Never use the active voice. It marks you with a big red X that says, ‘Looking for someone to blame? That’s me!’ Yes, you could take one for the team, but it’s not the weasel way.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A fourth article at the National Archives on July 2, 2019 titled Plain Writing Tips – Passive Voice and Zombies explains how to detect passive voice:

 

“So, here’s a handy tip to test your writing (by way of Ellen Fried on the ICN) and make you laugh. If you are afraid your sentence is in the passive voice, add the phrase ‘by zombies.’ If it still makes grammatical sense, it’s in the passive voice.

 

Passive: The form was processed and returned (by zombies).

Active: We completed your request and mailed the form to you…”

 

On April 14, 2024 I blogged about how Undelivered is a book by Jess Nussbaum on the never-heard speeches that would have rewritten history. A brief one was written by General Dwight Eisenhower, to deliver if the D-Day landings had failed:

 

“Our landings in the Cherbourg-Havre area have failed to gain a satisfactory foothold and I have withdrawn the troops. My decision to attack at this time and place was based on the best information available. The troops, the air and the Navy did all that bravery and devotion to duty could do. If any blame or fault attaches to the attempt it is mine alone.”

 

He originally used passive voice, and had said:

 

 “The troops have been withdrawn.”

 

That change was discussed in a fifth article, a speech by Jeffrey Nussbaum titled What Reading Teaches that appeared on pages 38 and 39 in These Vital Speeches - The Best of the 2024 Cicero Speechwriting Awards.

 

A sixth article from the Agency for Toxic Substances and Disease Registry at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) titled Your Guide to CLEAR WRITING has A Note About Active Voice on page 48:

 

“In the 19th and early 20th centuries, scientists wrote in active voice. But around 1920, scientists started adopting passive voice, possibly because it seemed more objective and impersonal.

 

Scientific journals have swung back to active voice, especially because all majot publication manuals (AMA, APA, Chicago) recommend it. After all, active voice is clear, concise, and direct.

 

In fact, it’s difficult to find any journals that actually advocate for the use of passive voice. And prestigious journals such as the British Medical Journal specifically instruct authors to use active voice.

 

Use active voice as much as possible in your article. Use passive only when the actor is unknown or is of less importance. For example, you may use some passive voice in parts of the method section of your article.”

 

A seventh extremely detailed article by Jacob M. Carpenter from 2022 in Legal Communication & Rhetoric magazine (Volume 19 pages 95 to 127) titled The Problems and Positives, of Passives: Exploring why Controlling Passive Voice and Nominalizations Is About More Than Preference and Style can be downloaded as a 34-page pdf.

 

The image with active and passive was modified from this one at Openclipart. A zombie silhouette also came from there. The weasel was adapted from an image at Wikimedia Commons.