Ice Breaker speeches for Toastmasters International and four big questions

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The very first project in the Pathways educational program at Toastmasters International is the Ice Breaker, Item 8101. For it you prepare and present a four-to-six-minute speech about yourself. How can you decide what to talk about?

 

Recently I was watching a DVD of the 1999 science fiction television series Crusade, written by J. Michael Straczynski. Its introduction has the following four big questions, one of which can be used to narrow your speech:

 

Who are you?

What do you want?

Where are you going?

Who do you serve and who do you trust?

 

They also appear at AZ Quotes under the technomage character name, Galen.

 

There is an article by Kate McClure in Toastmaster magazine for August 2023 (on pages 24 and 25) titled 6 Secrets for Surviving Your First Ice Breaker. Back on March 16, 2011 I blogged about The joy of listening to Ice Breaker speeches. In that post I listed six big questions from the earlier TV series Babylon 5.  

 

An image of the icebreaker Shirase II came from Wikimedia Commons.

 

 

Dick Van Dyke told his hardest story from a 75-year career

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dick Van Dyke turned 100 on December 13, 2025. And he published a book with a series of stories titled 100 Rules for Living to 100: An optimist’s guide to a happy life. An article by Sarah Lemire at Today on November 18, 2025 is titled EXCLUSIVE: At Almost 100, Dick Van Dyke Won’t Sit Still – and Is Eyeing 1 More Big Role. She notes that he had a 75-year career. There is another article by Liz McNeil in People magazine on November 25, 2025 titled Dick Van Dyke ‘Feels Pretty Good for 100.’ Here’s Why He’s Optimistic About His Centennial Birthday (Exclusive).

 

 On pages 105 to 113 there is a great story, titled Tell Your Hardest Story:

 

“In December 1973, I found a seat in a circle of chairs in a grim, fluorescent-lit meeting room at the Brentwood Veterans’ Hospital. Around me were military vets, young and old, all hospitalized for drug and alcohol addiction and gathered for regular group therapy. I was there as a visitor, doing research for my role as an alcoholic in The Morning After, a TV movie being shot elsewhere in the facility.

 

It was weird for these guys to have a Hollywood actor eavesdropping on their raw, real-life stories of struggle, I could tell. Right off the bat, I needed to assure them that I would be a sympathetic listener. ‘The subject of my movie is very personal to me,’ I began, ‘because I myself am an alcoholic.’

 

Their faces flickered with surprise. At the time, only my family and a handful of other people in my life knew about my drinking problem.

 

‘So, I understand some of what you’re going through. But really, I’m here to listen and learn.”

 

Then Dick decided to go public.

 

“The story got picked up across the country. As expected, when Mr. Goody Two-shoes admitted his addiction to the world, the public was shocked. Friends and colleagues from wherever I’d lived and worked called to offer sympathy and encouragement, reporting that they, and everyone they knew could barely believe the news. Within a week, I was getting letters by the thousand – people were moved and incredibly understanding. Many detailing how alcoholism had impacted them and their loved ones.

 

That reaction spurred me to go even more public. I appeared on The Dick Cavett Show, one of the best interviews I’ve ever done, and I told my story onstage in Washington, DC, for a press conference with other celebrity alcoholics. I am told that rehab facilities still show The Morning After to this day.

 

…. Each time I put a new layer of it into words, I feel a release of the power that alcoholism had over me. I was separating myself from the disease, seeing my experience as a battle with the disease. Telling my story was giving me power and freedom.

 

Each of us has our own hard stories of crisis and struggle. When we hold them in, out of fear or shame, they control us. But when we tell our stories, we’re in the driver’s seat. And when we share those stories, even just among our friends and family, we are literally helping one another to survive, just like that brotherhood of vets.”  

 

Pages 9 and 10 have a story titled Make Your Own Rules. On page 10 Dick has the following weasel words about his rules and stories:

 

“I readily admit that you might find variations of the same rule emerging in multiple stories here. That’s because my life, like everyone else’s, has its personality-specific ongoing themes – questions that pop up, over and over again, in different contexts, old challenges that look different in each new light, wisdom learned and forgotten and learned again.

 

I might also add that, for some of these stories, there’s not exactly a rule or even a specific question. Sometimes that’s because I know there’s some nugget of meaning in the story, but I haven’t figured out what it is. Maybe you can! Other times, it’s just a funny story, plain and simple. Because don’t we all sometimes just need comic relief?

 

Finally, if you’re inclined to count up these rules to see if there are exactly one hundred, as advertised in the title, your math might disappoint you, just a little. Quality over quantity, as the saying goes, right? I can assure you that this book will deliver enough main rules, sub-rules, ancillary rules, and multipart rules to last you a lifetime, yes, all the way to one hundred!”    

 

His book doesn’t bother to number those stories or even give us a Table of Contents. I got suspicious about whether there really were a hundred, and then wrote down the following list of all the story titles (grouped ten at a time):  

 

Don’t Act Your Age

Make Your Own Rules

Examine Your Head

Learn to Fall

Find Your Passion in Your Past

Tolerate and Cherish Your Little Brother

Face Your Fear

Find “The New You” Inside “The Old You”

Find Your People – A Story in Several Parts

Figure Out Who You Aren’t

 

Don’t Litter: Tips for Safety and Hygiene on Family Road Trips in the 1950s

Don’t Count on “The Big Break”

Hone Your Bit (Every Job Is Training for the Next One)

Don’t Do Live Morning TV

Some Secrets You Shouldn’t Tell

Eggs Again? Some Failures Are Just That

Dance with Chita

Go Nuts (But Maybe Not That Nuts)

Suck Up to the Landlady

Speak Up for Your Family

 

It Doesn’t Take a Good Boss to Do Great Work

Accept Your Limitations

Win an Oscar

Stay on the Phone

Make Christmas with What You’ve Got

Don’t Trust Machines

Reconsider the Boogeyman

Tell Your Hardest Stories

Play Against Type

Retire on Your Own Terms

 

Remain Anonymous

Start a Band

Commit to Play

Save All That Artwork

Believe in Fate

Take Your Doubts to the Desert

Accept “Rescue” with Grace

See the Pattern to Get Past It

Help Someone Find Their Voice: Do’s and Don’ts

Reimagine Your Legacy

 

Read the Fine Print

Learn from Animals: 3 Species, 4 Rules

Get a Good DJ

Write It Down

Bond Through Crisis

Be Someone’s Baker

Get Frank: A Meditation on Old Rifts

Remember the Good Stuff, Leave the Rest Behind

Reminisce While You Can

Get a Great Sidekick

 

Clear the Air

Get a Second Opinion (and a Third and a Fourth…)

Learn from Teaching

Cross Off Regrets

Learn from Shame

Never Call “Cut”

Don’t Match Jimmy

Don’t Live in the Past

It Pays to Go to the Gym

Build a Slide and Grandkids Will Come

 

Transmogrify Halloween (On Family Traditions)

The Clothes Make the Gnome

Stay Tall Inside

Hand Over the Keys

Read While You Can

Do Get All Judgy (When You’re Watching TV)

Learn a New Way to Fall

Carpe Chita

Remember Honestly

Live with Regrets

 

Your Purpose Doesn’t Need to be Grand

You Will Not Be Alone

Save the Afterlife for After Life

You Can’t Protect Your Survivors

Find Your Arlene

 

As you can see, there are just seventy-five. The book could have more honestly been titled Seventy-Five Rules from My 75-Year Career: An optimist’s guide to a happy life.

 

The wreath was adapted from one at OpenClipArt.  

 

Fun with filler words: A beer-drinking game based on a speaker using the phrase “you know”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lewis Black’s Rantcast # 191 | The Emmys has a rant sent in by Garret Cheney in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. (WARNING: Lewis’s language is Not Safe for Work – NSFW). Instead of getting upset by speakers using filler words, just get a cheap beer and take a drink every time you hear them said.  

 

Back on November 10, 2010 I blogged about another phrase in a post titled But, umm. In the TV show How I Met Your Mother, which included Cobie Smulders as Robin Scherbatsky, there was an episode titled Jenkins with a plot described on IMDB as follows:

 

“Meanwhile, Robin encounters fans of her pre-morning news show. When she met the boys at the college bar, one of Ted's students Scotty (Andrew Lewis Caldwell) comes over to tell her that he's a big fan of her work. Full of pride, she interrupts Ted's class the next day to loudly announce that she is the host of the show. After she leaves, the class explains that they are fans because her show comes on as their night of drinking is coming to an end (Her show is so early in the morning that the class is still at the bar from previous night), and her interjection, ‘but...umm’ is the basis for a drinking game (whenever Robin says this, the students take a drink).”

 

The beer glass was adapted from here at Openclipart.

 

Where were you on September 16, 1963, when The Outer Limits first was shown on television?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I will never forget precisely where I was. My four siblings and I were sitting in our TV room, next to the kitchen. The front had our 17” 1950 black-and-white television set, while the back had a long sleeper sofa. The television picture had started to flutter and roll vertically, as usual for after about ten minutes.

 

One of my brothers got up from the sofa and started walking over to the set to fix it. Then he got startled, and jumped straight up into the air when he heard the Control Voice first begin reciting the following introductory message for The Outer Limits:

 

"There is nothing wrong with your television set. Do not attempt to adjust the picture. We are controlling transmission. If we wish to make it louder, we will bring up the volume. If we wish to make it softer, we will tune it to a whisper. We will control the horizontal. We will control the vertical. We can roll the image, make it flutter. We can change the focus to a soft blur or sharpen it to crystal clarity. For the next hour, sit quietly and we will control all that you see and hear. We repeat: there is nothing wrong with your television set. You are about to participate in a great adventure. You are about to experience the awe and mystery which reaches from the inner mind to - The Outer Limits.”

 

The best-known episode was Demon with a Glass Hand, which you can watch here on YouTube.

 

Over the Fourth of July holiday a local TV station had a Twilight Zone marathon, which reminded me of The Outer Limits.

 

The TV set image came from Openclipart.

 

 

What sort of media coverage did we get at a worst moment?

 

The mass shootings on October 25, 2021 at the Boise Towne Square mall are an example of media coverage. Our newspapers and TV did an excellent job of covering a story that unfolded relatively slowly (because of the large area and many witnesses). They stuck to the facts and didn’t speculate. Their coverage repeated what the Boise Police released in their news conferences.

 

For example, the Associated Press had an article by Rebecca Boone and Keith Ridler on October 25, 2021 titled Police: 2 die, 4 injured in Idaho mall shooting. A second article by Rebecca Boone on October 26, 2021 is titled Coroner IDs suspect in Boise mall shooting that killed two. A third article on October 27, 2021 is titled Mall shooting victim’s family hopes to bring body home.

 

KTVB (TV7) also had several articles. October 25, 2021 there is one by Devin Ramey titled BPD: 2 people killed, 5 others, including suspect and a police officer, injured in Boise mall shooting and a second by Celina Van Hyming titled False social media post claims multiple suspects were involved in Boise Towne Square shooting. A third by Celina Van Hyming on October 26, 2021 is titled BPD Chief: Boise mall shooting suspect was known to police; a fourth on October 27, 2021 is titled Timeline: What we know about the Boise Towne Square shooting.

 

The suspected shooter, Jacob Bergquist, a 27-year-old Boise man died of his injuries. He killed two other people. One was Jo Acker, a mall security guard who was an Army veteran (paratrooper and forward artillery observer). The other was Robert Padilla Arguelles, a 49-year-old truck driver who lived part of the year in the southern Idaho city of Rupert and the other part of the year in Zacatecas, Mexico.

 

Our 26-hour CenturyLink internet outage

When I sat down at my iMac early on the morning of December 27th our internet service was down. This happens a few times each year. Usually just unplugging and replugging our CenturyLink modem restores it in a few minutes. Not this time. I tried calling their tech service, got put on hold and then hung up on.

It turned out things were way more serious than usual. Service wasn’t restored for 26 hours. No research or blog post for that day. Our local TV evening news mentioned that the problem was more than statewide. An Idaho Statesman article was titled Widespread CenturyLink outage shuts down phone services at Idaho prisons, education dept. An Idaho Press article was titled Nationwide internet outage affects CenturyLink customers. A USA Today article was titled CenturyLink outage knocks out 911 calls, hospital’s patient records.

The big side effect of losing the internet was losing our feed for watching Netflix. Elaine and I went back to reading books from our local public library. I had watched the first half hour of Springsteen on Broadway (see YouTube trailer) and was looking forward to seeing the other two hours.

The vintage test pattern image came from Wikimedia Commons.

Table Topics - After that, you might need this

A few days ago I saw two television commercials for Boise businesses. One was for the recently opened Altitude Trampoline Park. It was immediately followed by one for Advantage Spine and Disc. What a thoughtful pairing! First you show where to go to injure my back, and then you show me where to go to get it treated.

That got me thinking about other possible commercial pairings that could be in Table Topics questions.

A second pair is foods with hot peppers (like Fiery Doritos Locos Tacos from Taco Bell) and antacids (Tums or Rolaids).

A third pair is saloons and bail bonds (which you need if you get caught driving home after drinking).

Images of a trampoline, crutches, a chili pepper, a saloon, and bail bonds all came from Wikimedia Commons.  

How foreign travel can change your outlook

Never forget that a topic can be presented at different lengths - and either in writing or orally (and then via video). For the past decade I have enjoyed watching Rick Steves’ Europe on Idaho Public TV. At The Spokesman-Review on November 11, 2018 there was an article of his titled 10 tips for travel as a political act. (It also appeared here at his web site). Those ten tips are:

Get out of your comfort zone.

Connect with people, and try to understand them.

Be a cultural chameleon.

Understand contemporary context.

Empathize with the other 96 percent of humanity.

Identify – and undermine – your own ethnocentricity.

Accept the legitimacy of other moralities.

Sightsee with an edge.

Make your trip an investment in a better world.

Make a broader perspective your favorite souvenir.

 

In 2011 at TEDx Rainer he gave a 21-minute talk on The value of travel.

Earlier this year at YouTube there was a 1 hour and 13-minute lecture on Travel as a Political Act. Back in 2009 he published a book with that title. On February 21, 2018 at NPR there was an article on the 3rd edition of that book about how Rick Steves gets uncomfortable in ‘Travel as a Political Act.’

Proofread both the text and title of your speech or article

On December 2, 2018 Jane Genova posted an article titled Another high achiever commits suicide – Vice Admiral Scott Stearney, 58. She claimed:

“As the Daily Mail reports, Stearney was 58 yeas (sic) old. At the time he was overseeing naval operations in the Middle East as well as being a husband and father. He had joined the navy when he was 58.”

But according to the Daily Mail Stearney actually joined the navy back in 1982 – when he was around 22. Jane’s fascination with suicide is macabre.

On November 25, 2018 Jane posted another article with a mangled title - “FBI” – Will This New Dick Wolf Series Be Renew or Cancel? That title should have been something more like Will ‘FBI’, the new TV crime show from Dick Wolf, be renewed or canceled? Jane linked to an article at TV Series Finale that tabulated ratings for the first eight episodes. Then she whined that the relationships within the FBI unit had not gelled, and her vote would be to cancel. But she never looked further to ask why that happened.

According to  the Merriam-Webster dictionary a showrunner is:

“a person who oversees the writing and production of each episode of a television series and has ultimate managerial and creative control over the series.”

An article by Joe Otterson in Variety on October 10, 2018 titled Dick Wolf’s ‘FBI’ changes showrunners for second time described how the series had switched from Craig Turk, to Greg Plageman, and then to the tag team of Rick Eid and Derek Haas.

Jane had changed her mind. Earlier on October 31, 2018 she wrote another article titled Dick Wolf’s ‘FBI’ getting its footing that said her hunch was that ‘FBI’ will have a second season.

UPDATE

On December 9 th Jane posted another incorrectly titled article titled It Goes All the Way Back to Cain and Able (sic).

Advice about feedback from Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee

At Netflix I have been enjoying watching the current (tenth) season of Jerry Seinfeld’s TV show Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee. In Episode 2 Dave Chapelle says:

“For most people, not caring about the scrutiny of other people is one of the hardest things to do. I would even say harder than public speaking itself.”

In Episode 5 there is a longer exchange between Brian Regan and Jerry about evaluations by critics. It’s way more useful advice than the 1993 comedy routine public speaking coaches keep repeating:

“Jerry:  It is one of the comforts of comedy, I think, that almost never do people who are really good not get anywhere. Almost never.

Brian:  And I think it’s because of the objective response.

Jerry:  Right.

Brian:  No one can take away the laughs.

Jerry: Right.

Brian:  If it was just acting, it’s subjective and someone could say, ‘they’re not that good. They don’t have this. They don’t have that.’ But if you go on stage and make people laugh, nobody can say, ‘They’re not laughing.’

Jerry:  That’s what’s so funny to me when you get a negative review, which we all get from time to time. And you want to say…’They’ve already voted. I’m sorry. I’m sorry you didn’t like it, but the vote – We took a vote that night, and out of 2,000 people – I know you got this job at the newspaper, but it doesn’t mean anything.’

Brian: ‘It’s too late.’ You’re gonna go back and tell those people not to go in the past to the show they laughed at. Don’t. If you have a time machine, I’m telling you, don’t get in it and go back to Friday.

Jerry:  Yeah.

Brian:  I’m trying to make the audience laugh, and then – I’m not trying to please some guy at a typewriter, you know?

Jerry:  Here we go again. There’s no typewriters any more, okay? Speaking of time machines, you need one. And set it to ‘present.’ “

The microphone image came from Wikimedia Commons.

Homer Simpson’s speech gets shot down

The Simpsons “Simprovised” episode which airs on May 15th will have Homer try improv comedy in order to rebuild his confidence after he mangles a speech at work. (In 23 seasons Homer has tried and failed at many other things, so why not public speaking?)

The last three minutes will feature the voice of Dan Castellaneta answering questions from fans who call in.

The image of a Zeppelin came from Wikimedia Commons.

Hot Air, Theories, and the Mystery of Malaysia Airlines Flight 370

Shortly after midnight on March 8, 2014 Malaysia Airlines Flight 370 took off from Kuala Lumpur with a crew of 12 and 227 passengers. They headed toward Beijing, then turned to the west and just disappeared. Eventually it became clear that it had headed into the southern Indian Ocean and was presumed to have crashed.

There still is no physical evidence. What we know came only from radio transmissions and sonar pings. When will this mystery be solved? Perhaps in two to five years, based on what occurred after the crash of Air France Flight 447.

Much of what I have seen on television and read merely is hot air - theories that have no basis, and should be called fairy tales. These stories tell you nothing about the crash, but a lot about the prejudices of those who tell them. They made me think of a movie line spoken the  Major T. J. Kong, the B-52 pilot in Dr. Strangelove:

“Well I've been to one World's Fair, a picnic, and a rodeo, and that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard...”

Back on March 20th on MSNBC Chris Hayes had a six-minute segment which lamented that The plane is not in a black hole.  

The opening segment (titled American Idle Speculation) on the March 24th The Daily Show with Jon Stewart skewered the overblown TV coverage by US cable news networks CNN, Fox News, and MSNBC.

But, umm

That pause filler phrase was part of the plot for the Jenkins episode of the TV comedy How I Met Your Mother that first aired in January. You can watch a brief video clip here.

I’ve never heard anyone but Robin say “but, umm.” Other common two-word fillers are “I mean”, “you know”, and “well, basically.”

Robin Scherbatsky is from Canada. She has a serious career as a TV reporter, but had a secret past as a teenage pop singer, Robin Sparkles. Perhaps the “but, um” filler replaced her former “eh”.

Robin meets some fans of her 4:00 AM cable TV talk show at a college bar. One of her friend Ted's students, Scotty, comes over to say that he's a big fan. She interrupts Ted's class to loudly announce that she is the host of the show. After she leaves, the class explains that they are fans only because her show comes on as their night of drinking is ending. Her "but...um" is the basis for a drinking game. Whenever she says it the students have to down a shot of liquor.

Ted and Barney try the game, and both get thoroughly drunk. After Robin continues to brag about having admirers, Ted explains the drinking game to her. That night, his class invites him out to join their game. Robin decides to fix them by repeating the phrase excessively. During the class the next day Robin startles the hungover students by shouting “but, um” through a megaphone.

Public Speaking at The Office: Dwight’s Salesman of the Year Speech

In the second TV season of The Office there was an episode called Dwight’s Speech that originally aired in March of 2006. In it Dwight Schrute wins the award for Northeastern Pennsylvania Salesman of the Year and has to give a speech. His colleague, Jim Halpert, gives him some truly awful advice. Jim tells him that the key to being a good public speaker is waving your arms in the air, and banging your fists on the lectern - a lot.

Dwight give the speech, which here is shown revised into a phony 2008 vice presidential campaign ad. You also can view a black-and-white version of the uncut speech here. Much of the following script apparently comes from Benito Mussolini's "War Statement" and some other speeches made when he was dictator of Italy during World War II:

“[BANGS FISTS] Blood alone moves the wheels of history! [pause] Have you ever asked yourselves in an hour of meditation - which everyone finds during the day - how long we have been striving for greatness? [BANGS FISTS] Not only the years we've been at war – the war of work – but from the moment as a child, when we realized that the world could be conquered.

It has been a lifetime struggle [BANGS FISTS] a never-ending fight, I say to you [BANGS FISTS], and you will understand, that it is a privilege to fight. We are warriors! [Applause]

Salesmen of Northeastern Pennsylvania, I ask you [BANGS FISTS] once more rise and be worthy of this historical hour. [More applause, and Dwight gives a maniacal laugh] No revolution is worth anything unless it can [BANGS FISTS] defend itself.

Some people will tell you salesman is a bad word. They’ll conjure up images of used car dealers, and door to door charlatans. This is our duty: to change their perception. I say, salesman – and women – of the world... unite! We must never acquiesce, for it is together... together that we prevail. We must never cede control of the Motherland...

Audience: ...for it is together that we prevail! [Thunderous applause] [BANGS FISTS, REPEATEDLY]”

Gallows humor and fear of public speaking on Scrubs

Dr. Elliot Reid, played by Sarah Chalke, looks horrified when she hears about Dr. Burke’s suicide because she suffers from low self-esteem. When she tried to raise her spirits by purchasing a new car, it just became a fricking disaster. Her biography on the web site for the show quotes J.D. as saying:

"Both Dr. Kelso and I had heard enough of Elliot's inspirational stories to know that they inevitably end with someone killing themselves."

The clip is from My Way Home, which is the 100th episode of Scrubs. It is noted for many references to the Wizard of Oz - in which Billie Burke played Glinda, the Good Witch of the North.