John McEnroe gave the commencement address at Stanford University on June 18, 2023. His speech, titled This is the time to take your shots, appeared in the August 2023 issue of Vital Speeches of the Day magazine on pages 184 to 186. John said:
“....For all the positive steps we’ve seen in caring for our mental health, we’re also seeing the flipside where people are attempting to eliminate stress or pain altogether. Which is impossible. It’s the ‘everyone geta a trophy’ kind of mentality. It’s ridiculous and, honestly, a little dangerous. Not everyone is meant to be good at everything. And it’s very important for people who are high-flying mental giants, like all of you, to realize taking risks, failing, and learning from your failures is essential to your development. And sometimes a loss is the best thing that can happen to you.
In 1980 Björn Borg and I played in what is considered one of the greatest Wimbledon finals of all time. After three hours and 55 minutes of some seriously intense tennis, I lost in five sets. Of course, I wanted to win. I gave it everything I had – but I wouldn’t trade that moment for anything.
The truth is most people don’t remember who won that match. And don’t care. I once had the privilege of meeting the great Nelson Mandela. He told me he listened to that match on a tiny radio from his prison cell on Robben Island. And that the whole prison hung on every point of that match. That we gave Mandela a brief respite from the excruciating hell of 27 years of political imprisonment meant more to me than any award I’ve ever won. The lesson here is you don’t have to win to be part of something that is truly magical.
A few years after that Wimbledon final Björn quit tennis at age 26. It was devastating to me and the rest of the sport. In the mid-80s, if you were on my path. I would destroy you. Top of my game. But I wasn’t truly happy. Why? Because being the best in the world wasn’t as good as playing with someone who pushed you to greatness. Which is why I BEGGED my biggest rival to come back to the sport.
At the time he said to me, ‘If you’re not #1, it doesn’t matter whether you’re #2 or #100.’ Even though I understood where he was coming from, I disagreed with him then and still do. Number 2 is pretty damn good. Sometimes, you have to appreciate where you’re at in life. If your mentality is ‘If it’s not success, then it’s failure,’ your life will be really, really hard. Success us another chance to keep plugging away at what we love to do. That’s all it really is.
….Graduates, this is the time to take your shots. Your life will go by fast. Give it your all. Stand up for yourself. Stay curious. Be a good citizen of the world. Don’t get crushed under the weight of your expectations. Know that the real victory in life is the long game - measure your success by how much you evolve, not necessarily how much you win. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes. And for chrissakes, have the balls to say what you feel.”
John’s advice to be a good citizen differs from his earlier behavior. The Wikipedia article about him notes he was known for:
“his confrontational on-court behavior, which frequently landed him in trouble with umpires and tennis authorities.”
The image by Brett Weinstein came from Wikimedia Commons.
No comments:
Post a Comment