Tuesday, September 22, 2026

Misinterpreting what an audience member in the front row was doing




 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There is a useful 2026 book by Michael Lynton and Joshua L. Steiner titled From Mistakes to Meaning: Owning your past so it doesn’t own you. Google Books has a preview. They describe a worst moment where a speaker misinterpreted what an audience member in the front row actually was doing:

 

Chapter 6: The Front Row, pages 81 and 82

 

“Tony Schwartz works with leaders around the world to help them manage their energy by better understanding what’s in their way physically, emotionally, and mentally. Through books, speeches, leadership programs, and consultations he provides insights into what internally blocks us and the stories we tell ourselves when challenged. For all the passion he brings to his subject, Tony’s demeanor and success make him the kind of person you would not expect to lose his cool in front of an audience.

 

Many years ago, a company asked Tony to speak to a group of high-potential young leaders about the power of absorbed attention, and the myth that multitasking increases efficiency. As Tony paced the front of the room and scanned the audience, he saw heads nodding and basked in the mix of appreciation and laughter. Everyone seemed engaged.

 

Everyone except one young man in the front row who avidly scribbled on his phone. Worse still, Tony noticed that the man wore earphones and occasionally seemed to be mouthing words. Tony assumed that the man was catching up on emails or texts. Perhaps he was even listening to music – and singing along silently as he did. As much as Tony tried to focus on his talk, he felt himself getting more and more upset.

 

Finally, and impatiently, he walked over to the man and grabbed the phone out of his hand. As Tony held it up to the audience, he said, ‘This is exactly the problem I’m talking about. It’s not possible to do two things at the same time.’

 

Tony and the man locked eyes. To Tony’s surprise, he noticed that the man seemed remarkably unembarrassed.

 

‘Why don’t you take a look at what’s on the screen?’ he said calmly. Tony looked down at the phone, only to find nearly verbatim notes of his speech.

 

‘So, what about the earphones?’ Tony asked.

 

The man hesitated. ‘Are you sure you want to know?’

 

‘Yes,’ Tony heard himself reply sheepishly, instantly realizing that he should have cut his losses.

 

‘Well, I served in the military. On my last tour in Afghanistan, I led a scouting mission with my troops along a road. While we rested, I bent down behind a tank to tie my boots. Just as I did, one of my soldiers stepped on an IED. It exploded, killing him instantly, and injuring several other soldiers. I didn’t get injured because I was behind the tank, but the explosion pierced my eardrums and left me hard of hearing. I’m wearing hearing aids, and I also read lips.’

 

Tony felt a sickening wave of embarrassment wash away the positive energy that had animated the first part of his talk, He apologized.

 

So, what exactly went wrong?

 

For starters, it’s not great to grab anyone’s phone, and particularly not for an experienced speaker to do it in front of a large audience.”  

 

The cartoon was adapted from one at OpenClipArt.

 

 

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