Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Step up to more creative writing

Sunday I was looking for a ladder on Craigslist, and saw this wonderful listing:

Get high naturally - six foot wooden step ladder $25

Reach new heights in life one step at a time with this genuine American made environmentally friendly solution to shortness.

Investigate your attic, bring light back into your spare bedroom or more conveniently peer over your neighbors fence. There's nowhere to go but up with this life boosting accessory.”

It reminded me that how you describe objects or situations depends on your perspective. Even a humble step ladder can be exciting.

The Drive-By Truckers titled their retrospective CD Ugly Buildings, Whores, and Politicians: Greatest Hits 1998-2009. After you read that, it’s one small step to note that changing the leading three-letter phrase from pro to con is all that separates prostitution from constitution.

Back in 2009 I had fun describing the free ACA Open Knowledge Guide to Public Speaking with the style of ad copy:

“How would you like to ALMOST INSTANTLY obtain a COMPLETELY FREE e-book that just might CHANGE YOUR LIFE FOREVER? I am not just talking about a crummy MARKETING E-BOOK which REVEALS THE SECRETS of how YOU CAN MAKE BIG MONEY as a MOTIVATIONAL SPEAKER.

Nor am I talking about a not very AMAZING BOOK that can MAGICALLY ELIMINATE YOUR FEARS. It is not just a long ad for our FAMOUS SEMINAR that has been ENDORSED BY WELL-KNOWN CELEBRITIES.

But wait, there's more!!!

No OPERATORS ARE STANDING BY to try and sell you a MAGIC BULLET that will take your career to AN ENTIRELY NEW LEVEL.

This offer is not VALID ONLY FOR A LIMITED TIME. There is no MONEY BACK GUARANTEE. You do not need to ACT NOW.

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