Comically stilted language from a content mill

Today my Google Alert on “public speaking” pointed me to a web article from December 19th at the OPE D Project titled 4 Causes Most Folks Hate Public Speaking. The first three paragraphs say:

“It is typically mentioned that public speaking is the world’s primary worry – and that most individuals worry it greater than dying. The truth is that there isn’t any analysis to again up that declare – it appeared a few years in the past in a newspaper record and has been broadly quoted ever since. But it surely’s true that most individuals would somewhat do most different issues than rising up in the entrance of a bunch of individuals. And real analysis typically reveals it amongst individual’s high worries.”

This laughable nonsense likely was generated by a content mill, who took an article from elsewhere and then mechanically ran its words or phrases through a thesaurus.

The image of a clown on stilts came from Gabriel VanHelsing at Wikimedia Commons.

Beware of stilted language

The online Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines stilted as an adjective meaning:    

“A]  pompous, lofty 
  B]  formal, stiff”

A Google search on the word glossophobia led me to an article by Mark Migger at ATV Global with the curious title Geek Converse - Tech Discuss - Community Talking on Engineering Subjects that contained this sentence with some curious phrasing:

“....You may perhaps be excellent a providing speeches but come to feel reluctant to discuss about technology or you may perhaps have the skills and just have a typical panic of general public talking (regarded as Glossophobia).”

An awkward phrase like general public talking suggests that the article was stitched together for a content mill by an algorithm rather than written by a human. Public speaking or speaking in public are better phrases. 

Mark has another article titled Pie Recipe - Easy Recipe for a Delicious Apple Pie containing the following sentence:

“.... Fruit pie’s are the very hot favored all more than the entire world, and is quite often served with ice product.”

He didn’t say which other planets he’d also visited to decide fruit pies were favored more than this one.

An image of statues on stilts came from Wikimedia Commons.

Almost incomprehensible

Occasionally when I research a topic for this blog with a Google search I wind up going “through the looking glass” to an article posted on a content mill.

Content mills are web sites with large collections of cheaply produced articles. Their revenue comes from advertisers, and their content often is mass produced like cheap sausage - by ill-paid writers running words from a master text through a thesaurus to produce multiple articles containing almost incomprehensible sentences.

 I ran across a gem posted on April 17th about Fear of Public Speaking: Physical and Mental Manifestations. It began by saying:

“This commodity addresses some of the key issues regarding abhorrence of accessible speaking. A careful reading of this actual could accomplish a big difference in how you anticipate about abhorrence of public speaking.”

Then It listed the following confusing symptoms:

"1. You accept collywobbles in your stomach. 

2. Your award are sweating.

3. Your easily are shaking. 

4. If you acquisition yourself abashed by what you’ve read to this point, don’t despair. Everything should be bright clear by the time you finish. 

5. Your knees are as well abashed and you feel as if your legs are about to collapse.

6. Your affection beats abundant faster than normal. 

7. You acquaintance a slight blackout or you have a “fainting” feeling. 

8. You accept a abdomen disorder. 

9. Your face is ablaze and your aperture is dry. 

10. You accept “cold sweat” all over. 

11. 'Panicky’ thoughts.'” 

Affection should be heart, and aperture should (more specifically) be your mouth. I’d hope that other apertures, like my nose would be dry.

The image of sausage stuffing came from the Library of Congress collection.

Making web articles like sausage

There is an old saying about legislation that laws are like sausages, so it is better not to see them being made. I feel much the same about brief web articles covering how to reduce fear of public speaking. Are the writers being paid just $7, the price for a jumbo package of cheap sausages?

My Google Alert recently turned up a pair from Jeff Longley that reveal just how it is done, and it is not pretty. One is titled Great suggestions to overcome the fear of public talking, and the other is Excellent guidelines to beat the dread of general public talking. Word choices for the first four paragraphs can be summarized as follows:

“(Nearly everybody, Practically everyone) has that sense of (anxiety, concern) with (general public talking, community speaking) and what (far better approach, superior method) to address it than to (know numerous suggestions, understand many guidelines) to (overcome the fear, beat the worry) of (general public speaking, community talking).

It is not a surprise to (know, understand) that the (dread of community talking, fear of public speaking) is (really a typical issue, a prevalent difficulty) that hounds a (great deal of people, lot of individuals) all over the world and (many will not be, numerous are not usually) aware about how they (might very, may possibly) easily get (through, via) with such fears and lay it all to rest.

Here are some (prevalent hints, frequent tips) that (1, one particular) can apply and to (aid overcome, support conquer) the (anxiety, fear) of (community talking, public speaking).

(In case, If you) come (ready, prepared) to speak (just before, earlier than) a group, make it a point to (usually, constantly) come ready.”

Does anyone actually read this stuff?

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December 10, 2010 Update

I just saw an article called Appreciating Technical about proofreading. It was posted including a whole series of word choices, like I had reconstructed above. For example:

"....If {you are|you’re|you might be|that you are} {considering|thinking about|contemplating|taking into consideration} technical writing as a {career|profession} you {might|may|could|may possibly|may well|could possibly} {want to|wish to|need to|desire to|would like to} read the U.S. Department of Labor’s Occupational Outlook Handbook, 2009 Edition."